Thoughts on Modern Democracy

As far as blog posts go, this one will be lacking. I’m not sure I will be able to find a proper call to action, and I’m really not sure it matters. As it is more often than not, the action you take should be your own choice. In any case, this struck me recently as a topic that should be considered without so much emotional bias, and with an attitude of concern. But if you can read this without feeling the emotions kick in, you’re a better human than I am.

Democracy is a beautiful concept, and though I have a great deal of respect for the United States government which is still offering its 300+ million citizens (and any of the other nearly eight billion people on Earth) the highest potential to fulfill any dream imaginable, there are fundamental problems and inconsistencies that are plainly visible. Democracy, in its finest form, gives its power to the entire collective by allowing every individual to have a voice, and the United States and its freedom of speech are doing that better than anyone should have hoped to expect given the current state of the world.

Personally, as I write this, I almost want to drop the issue entirely. Ignore me, I’d ignore myself. I hate talking about problems, whether in a relationship, politics, education, family values, religion, etc. It usually leads to more conflict, and I go back and forth between feeling like its completely unnecessary and of the highest importance. That being said, and speaking of education, I believe wholeheartedly in battling ignorance (or lack of appreciation of the bigger picture) whenever possible. I don’t want to tell anyone what to believe, how to think, or what to do with the information they have (what would the world be without diversity?), but it never hurts anybody to change their perspective from time to time.

American citizens live in a world where they are expected to contribute to the goal, elect the officials that drive the progress, and then grow to participate directly. Enter secrets. Secret secrets. Conspiracy. Truth and half truth. Maybe some lies. Keep in mind, the secrets or conspiracies don’t actually need to exist in order to cause a problem for democracy. They just need voters to believe they exist to throw a wrench into the system. We have a democracy filled with ignorant (by no fault of their own) voters. And where they don’t know, they guess. If they can’t handle the truth? I don’t know. But when you really think hard about the constitution, and you consider the past few years, it all seems surreal and laughable.

We aren’t going to fix all the problems. We aren’t going to iron all the wrinkles. No, we’re going to go to prom with a tux that’s too big on top and short around the ankles with a crinkled purple shirt and mustard stained tie that we spend all our time trying to keep covered underneath. And we’ll probably have bad breath and a polka dotted face that only gets a kiss on the cheek at the end of the night. I’m not laughing either. Democracy does not and can not exist in a modern world. Not really. Not on this scale.

I should be clear. I don’t have much of an issue with the government. Managing society in 2021 is a complicated thing to do. I don’t personally want to know all the secrets. I don’t think anyone else really does either.

It may be that what is sensational will always be the most pertinent. It may be that the government slapping us in the face with all the dirty secrets would sober us up. To anyone reading and nodding your head, a high five. To everyone else, go buy an ice cream cone. You can pick whichever flavor you want.

Top Feeding

This is the world against itself
This is the world
This is the world as it strives
The world and the sanctioned bride
So allow this old world its time to ride
This is the world
The world as it feels so high

Hungry
Energized
Hungry
Somewhat pacified

In the wake of the fallen delight
On top of extinguishing light
They swim and somehow beat their chest
On top of themselves and all the rest
They only see what their bellies all need
They only see of the things this desire must feed
Look at the fish as they feed

He stands on the water
He stands in the air
Holding above all the things he must spare
And he throws to them bait that they never
Appreciate
Holding some more while the gifts are ignored

Just pull up the net
Stay off the net
Caught in the net

Hungry
Energized
Hungry
Somewhat pacified

Top feeders
Top feeders
Top feeding
What are you eating?
What are you eating?
What are you eating?

For Whom The Angel Prays – Ep. 6

She was alone.

She had been alone before, but it was different. There had always been a connection. A link back to something she could feel. No, she could not touch him, but she could always see him. She guarded him as he grew. She watched him while he developed. She protected him. She felt that he was always hers. She had waited for him until he was ready to embrace her and bring her into his world. She had stood over him as he fell asleep, and she was there while he had dreamed. She was there when he awoke, back then, in the sand.

Now, she was alone.

This feeling was not part of the plan. No. This was never meant to be felt. Not by her. Not by anyone. Her heart had been lost and her gut threatened to turn and spill from her mouth. Her thoughts were no longer her own and she felt no sense of comfort in the future. There was no future. There must not be any future. How could there be? And the past? Had any of what she thought she knew ever really occurred? No. It must have been a lie. A teasing nightmare. They had been together and would always be together and that was the way it was to be. Everything she thought she knew was gone. The expectation. The order. The direction and purpose. It was all gone.

She was alone. She was alone but she prayed. She spoke and she prayed to the one that she had lost.

…

The sun had risen and yet she was alone. She could see for miles to every horizon on every side in every direction. Her golden body rose. Higher and higher. She rose above the clouds and she watched the ground as it became blurry and distant. She saw more and more and then she saw the others.

The first ones came up from the water and into the green. They were all different, and they spoke nothing to the glittering female. They spoke nothing but faint noises amongst themselves and they ignored the girl named Aurelie, the golden angel with the dark hair. She touched them and spoke but none responded with anything but shouts of fear. They hid from her and they hid from each other. They formed communities with the ones they resembled, and they hid from the rest. Larger ones devoured smaller ones. Others attacked even the ones they resembled, and left the bodies to rot. They were afraid, and they were confused. Pairs of the ones resembling one another produced more of the same and some that had changed, and the angel felt a darkness in her as she witnessed. She wanted to stop them. She wanted to be them. She wanted to destroy them. And some she did destroy as her rage gave way to wind, rain, and violent shaking. The ground shattered beneath her, and the skies parted in waves that slammed together as she passed over all the others. Her body darkened.

She was alone and she had prayed.

Then, she saw the ones that made her feel the deepest things. They had bodies like hers, but they were timid like the boy had been when he woke in the sand. They were curious, the way he was. They had eyes like his, and they spoke like him. Aurelie watched them. She watched them always until eternity gave way to tomorrow. They made her angry but she loved them. They made her angry because they were not him, but she loved them because they could not be, and they were his. They found pairs amongst themselves like the others had before and she hated them for it, but still she loved them, though they should not have been permitted to touch one another the way he had touched her. They grew and became more like him this way, and then like her, they prayed. They told stories. They told stories of expectation. They told stories and they prayed.

Through all this, and though her feet found the ground again, and though she found she could walk with them, she was alone.

She was alone, but she had prayed.

For Whom The Angel Prays – Ep. 5

He reached out to touch her hand. She had never been touched before.

“Oh…”

The moment his hand came in contact with hers, vibration and pulses sizzled and sputtered through her body and then her head filled with a tingling warmth that forced the word from her mouth. The stars above glittered like fire.

“That wasn’t expected,” said the hulking boy.

“It was,” she replied, “but it had never been experienced.”

He let out a deep bellowing laugh, quietly resonant. “No.”

His hand moved from hers along the contour of her arm and up to her neck where his fingers were allowed to run lightly along the curve between her shoulder and ear. Inside her, the pulse and shock heightened and her skin felt almost cold in response. Reye brought his other arm up and around the lower back of the golden female, with the hand rested along the tops of her legs. The pulsing grew to fill her entire body and the sky began to glow a pale red and then orange. Reye pulled the girl close to himself and his chest brushed her bosom and then they were together. His forehead fell just slightly to lean against hers, and the pressure of the feeling she had held inside spilled into his head and down into his entire body like a slow light fighting to erase the darkness in every extremity. His eyes were closed, but he could see a yellow border to the silhouette that was the two of them. Her arms had come up to allow her hands to feel at the small of his back and then they came up further and pulled him closer to her and the sky became a brighter orange and then yellow and the two embraced under the fading stars as the sun also rose over the distant horizon with the mist still laying over the green.

“Mmmm…” she moaned, without hesitation.

“To know that should I ever go, I will always return in such a way.”

“Like that?” she playfully asked. “Then go, and come back, and go again to come back once more.”

“And while I’m gone?”

“I’ll wait.”

And then he left. Quickly, abruptly, and completely, he took himself from her and took the pulsing warmth away with him and then she was alone.

For Whom The Angel Prays – Ep. 4

The skies darkened and the world around the glowing girl and her counterpart became a dense blend of color, swirling and stretching in an arc around the pair. The boy stood hulking behind the angel, Aurelie. Though she couldn’t feel it, the ground beneath her shook while she surveyed the changing countryside. What was left of it.

“You’re letting it go to your head you know?”

“I’ve started to.”

“Maybe we should stop walking,” she suggested.

“You’re leading.”

“And do you think that’s the problem?”

“I’m not paying attention to anything but you.”

Above, in the skies, where darkness had not yet covered the azul, flashes of light pulsed through the spreading blanket. It pulsed and glittered along the ground until the piercing beams retreated back into the heavens and the glowing pockets condensed and focused into blinking crystals. The angel gazed upward as thousands of these crystals cooled and fell up into the dark blanket, rolling and swirling and locking into place. The boy had not taken his eyes away from those of the golden female, though the stare was not returned.

“I’d be impressed if I didn’t already know.” The girl was smiling.

“What do you know?”

“Do you want me to tell you?”

“You probably shouldn’t,” he replied, laughing deeply. And slowly.

The angel shook her head and the light flooding the ground beneath her feet swung in an a sweeping arc in front of her. “What if I don’t say anything for a while?”

“You don’t need to.”

The angel continued gazing skyward at the blanket of coalescent flashes. The earth had ceased its shaking. Neither the boy or the girl held any awareness of the surrounding landscape, but they could feel the cool touch of the mist that had slowly draped itself around them. The air and mist held loosely onto the radiating glow that came from the angel’s body, and beyond that, nothing could be seen by the hulking boy with the booming voice. Neither could his vision pierce the heavy mist had he desired it to.

He extended an arm with his fingers just slightly curved, and those fingers found rest just below the glowing female’s shoulder. When contact was made, the glow she produced dimmed as she inhaled quickly and sharply, but smoothly, and that glow returned brighter than before. The deep purple of the sky deepened and the crystalline lights expanded.

Her eyes found his again. They must have held the source of the glow she produced.

“Should I take them back?” The deep voice groaned.

Her head moved left to right slowly and then paused before moving back and forth quickly.

His head nodded and the ground beneath the pair shook again while the lights above took on their colors.

…

“I wouldn’t.”

“No…?”

“No.”

For Whom The Angel Prays – Ep. 3

The delicate mist that came from the crashing cascade landed lightly and cool on the cheeks of the one the angel called Reye. As the droplets of that mist landed, Reye was forced with the realization of his vulnerability. He considered the sensation on his face to be pleasant, even in contrast to the equally pleasant and growing warmth that felt as a ragged cap atop his head. The coolness and crispy pinch that the mist brought to his face gave him a sense of relief. Relief in knowing that the increasing heat could not consume him. Yet, had it not been for the relief of the cold, Reye may not have ever considered the warmth to be a potential threat. That, the potential to be overwhelmed by something he considered to be good, made him uneasy.

“And where would you like to go?” he asked the golden female.

“Home.”

That place. There had never been another soul in that place. The place where Reye used to dance. There were thoughts and images and intentions, but he had always been alone. The memory had come at the sound of the word, but it was only his memory.

“I suppose I’ve never actually been,” Aurelie spoke gleefully, “but I’ve always wanted to visit.”

“You’ve always wanted to go home.”

“Come home.”

“And you consider it yours?”

“You consider it mine,” she corrected him. Her jet hair had stopped framing her face, and the burning eyes glinted while that hair whipped around in the growing wind. The wind. It had come suddenly and was now blowing from every direction while the ground beneath the pair cracked and groaned. Reye began to walk, and the shining girl hesitated. Had he started off in the opposite direction, she might have followed, but he had turned to make stride into the strongest of the blowing winds. The grounds sank beneath his bare feet and filled with clouded water as those feet left their depressions.

Aurelie squinted an eye and tilted her head.

Reye stopped, but did not turn to face the girl. “You should go first.”

“Go?”

“Yes.” His tone was gentle, but he spoke quickly. “I’d rather be able to see you while we walk.”

Aurelie focused her gaze on the large boy with the deep voice and tilted her head to the other side. “Ok.”

She seemed to move without touching the ground as she passed Reye, and as she passed he focused his eyes just ahead of her, where growing green stalks sprouted darkened buds that blossomed into purple, red, indigo and yellow blooms.

Reye smiled, and Aurelie turned her head away while she continued into the expanding valley between the cascades and the rolling hills. He was following just behind her, close enough to reach out and grab her left hand, if he desired.

Sunlight reflected shimmering from the surface of the water in the little pools that the pair left behind. The water was clear.

For Whom The Angel Prays – Ep. 2

“What are you doing?”

“Just waiting.”

Waiting.

“Is there a problem?” Her face bore no look of concern.

“What did you do?”

“I told you we couldn’t stay there forever.” As she spoke, rays of sun broke through the cloudless sky. “Really, I think you’re trying to confuse me.”

“No.”

“No?” She asked the question as if there were no way she was wrong.

“I’m just… I’m… Where did we come from?”

“You tell me,” Aurelie almost commanded.

“The dance.”

“Dance?”

“No”, the boy, Reye, shook his head. “It wasn’t like that.”

“What was it like?” The water behind Aurelie rose from the horizon in rounded waves, and then froze. The freezing mounds became dark and dull, and then the green crept through in patches that expanded until the mounds were covered by it. It shifted and swayed dark to light and back to dark under the gentle breeze that blew from beyond.

“I was moving,” the boy recalled, “and the things I saw would change when I moved.”

“Of course, why wouldn’t they?”

The boy looked past and then back to Aurelie. “There was nothing else like me.”

“I know.”

Reye placed his right hand at the back of his head and felt the warmth of his hair on his palm and fingertips.

“And?”

“I rarely spoke.”

“I remember,” replied the golden female. “…I like your voice.”

“My voice?”

“It’s my favorite thing about you.”

“It is?”

The tall, dark haired and golden bodied female took a step back, away from Reye. “Why would I lie to you?”

Lie? Something in Reye’s chest warmed until it seemed to burn. It quickly became uncomfortable. “Why did you do that?”

“I’m not sure what you’re asking me,” she responded, slowly.

The burning in the boy’s chest became a dull, numbing tickle. “I’m sorry,” he finally answered with gravity. His voice had deepened in a profound way, and as he noticed the change, the waters behind him begun to cascade, first rising as they had done in waves behind Aurelie. “I thought that was you.”

“I suppose it was, in a way.” Her tone was becoming less playful.

Reye turned to watch the falling water crash into the ground. A band of colors arced around the mists that the crashing produced.

“It’s beautiful,” Aurelie whispered.

“It’s how I feel about you.”

“I know.”

For Whom The Angel Prays – Ep. 1

“Where is this place?”

“You don’t know?”

“Should I?”

“I would have thought so.”

“I don’t even know where I was before.”

“Well then how should I know where we are?”

“What?” He asked in desperation. What’s that supposed to mean. He was thinking to himself.

“If you don’t know, then how do you expect me to have any idea?” She was speaking playfully, but her tone mocked him.

He began to look around. There was water everywhere. Well, not directly beneath him. He was sitting in the sand. There was water all around, in every direction, and not so much as a tree or blade of grass coming from the sand.

“We’re on an island,” the female pointed out.

“I can see that”, he groaned. “But there’s nothing here and no one… Hey… Who are you?”

“This is the island between heaven and hell.”

“What?”

“That’s where we are.”

“You said you had no idea where we were.” He was confused, irritated, and then more confused.

“Well…” she started, “You’re getting your bearings.”

“I am?”

“And I’m interpreting.”

“Ok.” He dug his palms into the gritty hot sand and stood. “Interpreting what?”

She laughed and her eyes formed two arcs over her cheeks, framed by straight, jet black hair. “I’m Aurelie.”

“Aurelie…” he echoed.

“Yes, Aurelie. An extension.”

The boy looked closely at the girl. She was tall and thin, but not narrow. Her body was broad around the middle and her legs tapered to her feet. She was probably beautiful without the… She isn’t wearing anything but I can’t see any…

“Is there a problem?” she asked.

“What?” No. I guess not.” The boy’s head turned toward the water. The other water… To his right. “Are you naked?”

“No,” she answered.

The boy said nothing.

“I’m wearing light. You like it this way, I can tell.”

“I do?”

“Don’t you?” She was still speaking playfully.

“Yeah.” He did.

The girl laughed harder than before. “Well then, Reye… Make something happen.”

“Huh?” He was blushing.

“We can’t stay here forever,” the girl stated, obviously bored.

The pair looked into each other’s eyes. His were crystal blue and hers were like the sun in late afternoon. They felt no distance between those pairs of eyes.

Ok. Reye dropped his gaze to the sand at his feet and watched the grains elongate and turn from dusty brown to emerald green, and then there was grass below where there used to be none.

The girl was smiling.

Stolen Kisses

It was a funny little game

Where no one wins and no one gains

And rules they fall into change

Despite ever knowing that all were insane

We backed up and played all the same

Not only once, but just twice, ever binding enraged

Scattered kisses blown off from the stage

…

And though you don’t understand

You’ll not regret this coming back as we planned

…

Sacred rules and natural fools

Tell tales of the things come to pass

Tell of ideal and of rejecting the high

Even clearer when high be defied

Didn’t fall, just forsake, he sinks to embrace by and by

While the kisses he hides find the love of their lives

On the holder of all holy light

Let The Sun Come Down

Speechless
And forced but so desired
Anger all abounds
Dissention grown in cold
Producing elongation
And twisting the profound
Such is the example
When you let the sun go down
Ignore the shattered ground

And here the sun comes down
In the latent night
Where men and angels play
Until they start to fight
In silence no repair
They fight until they die
When nothing can be spoken
And they let the sun go down

The silence isn’t deadly
And really isn’t there
Not lacking what they say
But the fact that none can hear
The crystal baby blue
The lunar glow a bloody hue
Fortune fails to pay its dues
And leaves wide open
Ugly wounds

They say don’t let the sun go down
Just let the sun come down
Then let the sun go down
And let the sun come down
Let The Sun Come Down
Do Not Let The Sun Come Down